Title: The Visit
Fandom:Ultraviolet
Pairing: Jack/Michael
Rating: R
Author: Alison
Status: 1 in a series of 8.
Disclaimers: The characters Jack, Michael, Pearse, Vaughan, etc. from 'Ultraviolet' belong to Channel 4/World Productions and the wonderful writer, Joe Ahearne
I am just taking them out to play with, and will return them as found.
No copyright infringement is intended, and no money has passed any hands.
This has all been done for love.
Email: ali@metadigm.co.uk
Points In Time 1: The Visit
by Alison
Jack looked down with affection at the form of his sleeping ex partner. He sat on the bed and considered the events that had brought him here. He remembered his first meeting with the Vampire who had been his contact in the counterfeiting job. Of course he’d not been aware of his true nature for some time, but had always been impressed by the man’s smooth professionalism and competence. When he had discovered the truth, he had been both frightened and excited, awed by the discovery that the creatures of myths actually existed.
Like the fraud, he had not mentioned anything to Michael aware that he would be both angry and confused at what he would see as a betrayal of his trust. He had though been confident of his ability to bring Michael around to some form of acceptance. He always had done so.
So life had carried on as usual, except for the thrilling encounters and the extra money in his bank account. He’d become engaged to Kirsty, well aware that Michael was in love with her, but again supremely confident that Michael would do nothing to hurt or ruin their friendship. He had been fond of Kirsty, he thought he’d loved her, but partly he knew he didn’t want Michael and Kirsty as a pair. Somehow he felt that Michael would have settled too happily into cosy domesticity and that he would have, in some sense, lost him.
The call to cross over had come totally out of the blue and at a very inconvenient time, but he’d gone. His turning for help to Michael when he realised that the squad were after him, was what he always did when in a fix, and Michael had initially acted, as he knew he would. What he hadn’t reckoned with was Michael’s determination to understand what was going on, and his being drawn into the squads clutches. He had entirely misjudged Michael’s frightened reaction to him and had badly handled the whole affair in the playground. He couldn’t recall if he had any awareness of the time before returning on the bridge, but had looked into Michael’s dejected eyes and watched his collapse after their brief talk, and knew that Michael still cared.
He stretched slightly and thought how much he enjoyed what he had become, it suited his nature. What had astonished him though, was the deep sense of loss he felt without Michael. He had never really examined his feelings for him; he had just always been there Dependable, loyal, trustworthy Michael. He screwed his nose up at the words, god they made him sound dull and Michael was never dull, cynical, sarcastic and witty yes, dull no. A little too straight laced and narrow minded at times it must be admitted, with an annoying tendency to try and make him feel responsible for his actions, but one couldn’t have everything. Michael had always been part of his life and he had assumed he always would be, just as he assumed that Michael’s friendship and loyalty would always be his. The others had been amused at his confusion and had eventually agreed to him seeing Michael. He’d sensed that they too were interested in him, and not only because of his involvement with the squad.
So here he was, and he was going to have to be very careful how he handled this encounter. If it went well, he thought, he could persuade Michael. If Michael felt half the loss that he did, he was convinced that he could as usual charm his friend into doing what he wanted.
He reached forward, took the gun off the bedside cabinet, then shook Michael. Michael grunted before sitting bolt upright. He looked at Jack and a smile of pleasure crossed his features.
"What’s up?" he said, his smile slowly freezing, to be replaced with a look of fear. His eyes flicked to the bedside cabinet, returning swiftly to Jack’s face.
Jack smiled back. "Hi Mike," he said, "I’ve come to say hello and to say I’m sorry."
A look of surprise and suspicion crossed Michael’s face, he moved slightly away from Jack and passed his hands over his face.
"I think I’m having an hallucination," he said slowly. "Did I hear the word ‘sorry’ cross your lips?"
Jack’s smile increased and he placed his hand over his heart.
"I’m wounded mate, yeah you heard the word sorry," He looked at his watchful friend, and grinned again. "Do you want to know what for?"
Michael leant back against the headboard and contemplated Jack for a few minutes in silence. His expression grew slightly less hostile and he nodded his head.
"Sorry for everything, Mike," Jack said slowly. "Sorry for taking you for granted, for abusing your trust and mostly for leaving you so frightened and lonely."
Michael took a sharp intake of breath.
"You bastard," he said angrily, "you bastard, Jack, you never fucking change. Sorry! you ought to be fucking sorry. God you ought to be on your knees begging my forgiveness." He took another deep breath and turned his face.
Jack remained quiet, waiting for Michael’s anger to run its course. There was silence in the room for some long minutes then Michael turned back to him and said slowly and passionately.
"Why, Jack, for god’s sake please tell me why?"
Jack ran his fingers through his hair and considered how he was going to phrase this.
"It was the buzz the thrill at first," he said truthfully. "I told you I hadn’t realised who I’d got involved with, but when I discovered it I was frightened but excited. Mike, I could see the potential the opportunities."
He risked a look at Michael’s face. It was fixed on him, frozen and emotionless, he hurriedly continued.
"I hadn’t realised that I would be asked to cross over so quickly, least of all on the eve of my bloody wedding. I thought I had some years to plan and wait," he stopped and looked at Michael again. "and work out what I was going to tell you."
Michael blinked at the last part of Jack’s speech. He then enquired very slowly
"And Kirsty?"
Jack felt he was walking a tightrope; he looked at Michael and stayed silent few a few seconds.
"Somehow Mike, your understanding and acceptance seemed more important. I did care for her, I thought I loved her but…" he stopped and shrugged his shoulders.
"Oh now he bloody tells me," Michael said through gritted teeth. "Oh how convenient you shit, let me tell you that because of you I haven’t even the pleasure of Kirsty’s company," he stopped suddenly.
Jack kept his face still but inside he was smiling with satisfaction. Slowly, he thought, don’t over reach yourself.
"Mike," he said carefully, "Mike, I’ve missed you."
A look of affection flashed in Michael’s eyes to be replaced by what Jack hoped was an attempt at indifference.
"Your choice," he replied coldly.
Jack felt his initial triumph fading. He looked searchingly at Michael and thought hard then decided to risk opening himself up.
"Mike, I mean it, I really have missed you," he swallowed unnecessarily then went for it. "I’ve never said this, I suppose I’ve never really thought it through clearly, but Mike, I do love you, you know."
Michael sat up from the headboard and looked in amazement at Jack then, to Jack’s relief and slight indignation, gave a great shout of laughter.
"Jack are you trying to seduce me?" he said breathlessly, wiping a stray tear from his eyes. "It won’t work, I’ve watched you too many times and I know all the moves." He grinned again. "Now do I say," and he affected a high falsetto. "Oh Jack I never knew you cared, or is it, you’re only saying it to get inside my pants?"
"You rotten bugger," said Jack in mock hurt, and they smiled at each other in genuine amusement and affection. Jack felt he could risk a bit more and reached out and touched Michael’s hand, Michael shivered but made no attempt to move.
"Mike," he said earnestly, "I’m still me, I’m still your friend, I still care and I still need you to be my best mate and partner."
Michael looked at him sadly, and shook his head. "Jack, given the chance, I’d go for everything to be exactly as it was between us, ‘cos if we’re into honesty, I have to tell you, I’ve missed you like hell." He sighed, looking carefully at Jack as he spoke, seeming to measure his words. "Let’s not forget that, by your own choice, you are a Vampire, and I unfortunately, due to that choice, am a Vampire hunter."
He smiled mirthlessly. ‘My lot call you leeches by the way."
"Somehow that doesn’t surprise me," Jack said thoughtfully. "What other fascinating things do ‘your lot’ say about us?"
Michael thought for a moment. "That you have no souls, and that you are monsters without feelings or emotions. Also that you want to destroy us."
"Mike, do I act as if I have no feelings or emotions, would I be here if I didn’t bloody want to see you, hoping against hope that you will eventually be with me?"
He snuck a look at Michael’s face, it was thoughtful but open, so he decided to get more forceful.
"At this moment all I want to destroy is that bloody, deceitful lying bunch of bastards that caused all this mess with us in the first place."
Michael frowned, "They all have their own stories of loss due to your kind," he said some what coldly, "and remember, Jack, you brought this on yourself."
"Oh shut it Mike," Jack sighed, exasperated. "I’ve had enough morality checks for an evening, you haven’t answered my question, am I a monster?"
"No, Michael said quickly, frowned, then began again. "No I don’t think so, it would all be so much easier if you were, but I can’t believe it. Pearse says," he stopped looking guilty at the mention of the name, as Jack filed it away for future reference. "He says that you manipulate us, that you smooth talk us into believing you. He says that you are big on giving people free choice, but have ways of finding our weaknesses and desires. Jacob used Kirsty to manipulate me very successfully." He stopped looking searchingly at Jack.
"Is that what you are doing to me, Jack?"
Jack looked Michael in the eyes and put as much sincerity in his expression and voice as he was able.
"How can I answer that?" he asked. "If you think Mike, I’ve always tried and usually succeeded in getting you to do what I want, that’s been the nature of our relationship. Of course I’m trying to influence you, haven’t I made it plain that I don’t want this life to be without you. What will you have me do, beg on my knees, grovel, beat my breast. I’ll do them all if it means you will think about what I’ve said."
"Oh shit," Michael said quietly, and went very still.
Jack was amazed to see tears in his eyes.
"Oh shit," he repeated, even quieter as Jack reached for him pulling him into a tight embrace. Michael tried to fight him off, but Jack held on, until Michael relaxed, accepting the embrace silently.
Jack held him for some minutes then gently let him go. Michael grimaced and lay back on the bed avoiding his gaze. Jack sat watching him in silence, surprised at how effective his honesty had been. This encounter has not gone as I planned, he thought, but somehow it has exceeded all my expectations.
"I knew this would have to happen, but I don’t think I expected it to I be this painful or difficult," Michael finally said. "I’ve been so angry with you, when it would be so much easier and cleaner if I could just hate you. I’ve been dreading that when we finally met, I’d discover that everything I’ve been told about your kind was true, but then, assuming I survived the encounter, I knew I could finally be rid of you."
He sighed, rubbed his hands over his face, and sat back against the headboard.
"Jack you have to go, I won’t tell the squad you’ve been, and I can’t kill you, but I can never become what you have become, so I think it would be easier for us both if we didn’t meet again."
He turned away and Jack heard him murmur to himself. "I don’t think I could bear it."
There was silence in the room. Jack got up from the bed and walked to the door.
"Till the next time, Mike," he said, and silently to himself, "And next time I will not be leaving alone."
Continued in Part Two
Reflections.