TITLE: THREE LITTLE WORDS

AUTHOR: PEJA

FANDOM: The Sentinel

Rating: PG

Pairing: Jim/Alex Blair/MOC

Summary: when sentinels mate, trouble follows

Feedback: Well now, you decide

Email: daltonavon@yahoo.com

Archive: Peja's Ravings

Website: http://members.100free.com/users/daltonavon

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THREE LITTLE WORDS

By

PEJA

*******************

Six months.

Jim could hardly believe he was back. Six months is a long time to be gone. Gone without a sign. Without a word.

He'd left the loft that morning like nothing had happened.

Gotten into the car and driven away like everything was perfect.

He hadn't gone to the University

His classes had to be cancelled.

He hadn't reported for duty at Major Crimes that afternoon

Not even a call to explain

The car had been found on the side of the road.

The driver's side door was still open, waiting for his return.

But he hadn't returned.

Not in six months

Six months of not knowing.

Six months of Jim knowing he'd caused the vanishing act with three little words.

Six months.

But now that was over.

Ended by one simple mistake in judgement on Blair's part.

Ended because he'd forgotten to take Jim's name off the notification form.

Ended in hospital.

God, it can't end like this.

*****************

Jim started violently as the light weight of a hand touched his arm.

"Have you spoken to him?"

"No. He hasn't been awake long."

"Well, when are you going to?"

Jim shrugged. "He doesn't want to see me."

"Jim, you can't know that."

Jim dragged his gaze away from the observation window. Away from the man he'd counted as his best friend for several long years. "Simon, I do know that."

Simon met Jim's gaze full on. "There's more to this than him leaving, isn't there? More than you told anyone?"

Jim snorted. "You mean, do I know why he left? Yeah. I know." Jim stared at the wasted creature in the hospital bed, monitoring the thready life signs in his own special way. "I know."

Simon's dark gaze asked the question for him.

Jim shook his head. "My fault."

"Did he know about.....?"

"He knew."

"So....."

Blair's door crashed open, killing Simon's question dead on, and a flashily dressed man stormed the still room.

"Romeo, what the hell happened last night?"

Blair turned his head toward the intruder, barely batting an eyelash. "Nothing."

The big man stalked him. "Nothing?" he fairly screamed, waving his arms wildly. "Nothing? Than how come I have a high roller calling up demanding his tumble cash back? How come I hear the escort he hand picked...."

Behind the window, Simon asked, "Escort?"

Jim held up a silencing hand, his blue gaze following the frenzied man pacing Blair's room.

"......And I assured him would be his perfect date, is not satisfactory? How come is that?"

Blair grinned a mirthless grin. "We didn't click," he said in the same dry, brittle voice.

"Didn't click?" The man gestured up and down Blair's battered body. "Didn't click? So he beat the fuck out of you instead? Romeo, this is happening every time you go out. I just don't understand. Why....?"

"He paid. Money's in the breast pocket of my jacket."

"Paid?" Simon's voice was a duplicate of the man in the room.

"Oh, God...." Jim whispered. "My fault."

"That's what I thought. You agreed to this?" the man said. "Again? You let another bastard beat you? Do you know how close you came to dying this time?"

The dark grin was back. "Better luck next time."

"Not bloody likely." The guy snapped, easing down onto the side of the bed and taking Blair's hands in his. "Jesus, Romeo. You've got to stop this."

Blair tilted his head, shrugging. "Sure, Nick. Whatever you say."

The words were just that. Without meaning.

"Jesus, what that bastard did to you." Nick cupped the less battered cheek. "Have they given you a mirror?"

"Wasn't interested."

"Wasn't interested? Romeo, that animal pulverized your beautiful face. You're going to need weeks to heal."

"We could always put a bag over my head and advert me as the elephant man."

"That is not funny, Romeo Do you even know how bad this time was? They had to take out your spleen. It ruptured from the kicks you took. Your ribs are cracked. Again. One lung collapsed. You're lucky to be alive."

Blair shrugged. "Guess that all depends on your point of view."

"Why?" Nick demanded, his voice breaking. "Why can't you stop this? You're killing yourself. Don't you see that?" A tear escaped Nick's green eyes. "I hoped you'd come to think I was enough. You'd be able to put that bastard who hurt you behind."

"Nick, don't..."

"Don't what? Don't care? Don't worry? Don't...love you? Well, that's not going to happen. I do. I can't turn it off. I love you. I'd die for you. Just like you're dying for..."

"Don't say it, Nick." Blair's words were hard, uncompromising. "If you do, I'll walk out of here and out of your life. Take what I can give or let go."

Horror filled the big man's rugged features. "Romeo....."

"Don't ever mention him again, Nick. Not ever."

Nick nodded. "I...won't."

Behind the observation window, Jim cringed.

"How long before I can get out of here, Nick?" Blair asked, changing the subject.

"They want to keep you a few days."

"Not a good idea."

"Romeo, you just had major surgery. No doctor is going to discharge you."

Blair shook his head. "Not acceptable. I can't stay here. Arrange for me to be taken to another hospital. This one....is dangerous. I could be recognized."

"I'll do what I can." Nick pushed to his feet. "Romeo, there are some cops outside. They want to talk to..."

"No." Blair shook his head. "No way."

"But..."

"Nick, I took money to let the client trash me. You want that to come out?"

"Okay," Nick murmured. "I'll pull some strings. Get this covered up. Again." He captured Blair's dead gaze. "I don't know how many more times I can sweep these things under the rug, Romeo. You have to stop. Okay? Promise this was the last time."

"Sure, Nick. Anything for you." Blair mouthed words both men knew were meaningless. "Go make those arrangements, lover. I don't want to be here any longer than I have to."

Simon spoke softly into his com. "Rafe, there's a man coming out of Blair's room. I want to talk to him. Quietly."

Rafe's acknowledgement came and went as Simon and Jim watched the man, Nick, bend a press a tender kiss on Blair's forehead.

Blair shrugged away from the tender caress. "Okay okay, enough already. Jez."

Pain spasmed across Nick's face and he turned away. "Back in a sec, Romeo."

"Yeah, hurry the hell up, will ya, Nick."

"He's changed." Jim murmured.

"And not for the better." Simon agreed.

Jim stepped away from the observation window into the shadows. "It's my fault. Everything. God, what if I can't fix this."

"Question is," Simon said softly. "Are you sure you want to try?"

The door swung open and Rafe could be heard saying, "Just a couple minutes. I'm sure you want to help the police catch the person who did this to your friend."

"Romeo doesn't want to press char...." Nick stammered to a halt. "I know you." he said, staring at Simon. "What do you want with me and my.... Romeo."

"Don't you mean Sandburg?" Simon said softly, his narrowed gaze zeroed in on the other man. "Blair Sandburg?"

Nick shook his head. "Don't know any Sandburg. Sorry. Now, I got things to do. Romeo...." He backed up towards the door, crashing into Rafe's lean body. "Come on, guys. I haven't done anything. What's up with this strong arm act?"

"Oh, I think we can come up with some charges. Like maybe, prostitution?" Simon took a step nearer the man, scowling, "Or maybe.... kidnapping?"

"Kidnapping?" Nick yelped. "You're out of your minds. Who the hell am I supposed to have kidnapped?"

Simon tipped a nod toward the observation window.

Nick's gaze followed the directed path and he blanched. "Romeo....?"

"Sandburg." Jim stepped out of the shadows. "His name is Blair Sandburg. And he's my partner."

"No," Nick gasped, "No, you're lying. Romeo said he'd walked out on a bad relationship, but....A cop. No way."

Jim's smile was feral. "Are you calling me a liar?"

"What if I am? Anyway, even if what you're saying is true, you can't have him. You can't throw him away and then take him back like he was a toy you pick up when you're mood suits. You're destroying him."

"I think I can."

"Please..."

"I think you should sit down and have a nice chat with Rafe and the captain here." Jim snarled, dragging out a chair and shoving Nick down into it. "While I go talk to Blair."

"He won't listen to you," Nick rasped. "He won't leave me for you. I know he won't."

Jim grinned. "You protest too much to be convincing."

Simon grabbed Jim's forearm. "Jim, this man may have a point. Be sure of what you're doing. Blair...Well, you know."

Jim eyed him narrowly. "I know what I'm doing, Simon." His blue gaze moved to the grim figure beyond the glass. "I know what I'm doing."

***********************

"Nick, have you manag....."

"Hello, Blair," Jim said, hurrying the slow progress of the door with a firm shove.

Bland-faced, Blair watched the big cop approach him.

"Long time no see."

"Not long enough, Ellison," Blair rounded on him drily.

"Wanta tell me about it?"

A sneering grin tugged one corner of Blair's mouth. "What? Me leaving, or...." He gestured the length of his battered body.

"Either one. Both. Whatever. Both cases are open."

Blair shook his head. "Close 'em. I have."

Jim drew up a chair and sat down. "Afraid I can't do that. You know how it is. Validation of the facts and all that."

Blair shrugged. ""Whatever." A coldness gleamed in his blue gaze. "How's the wifey? Kid born yet?"

"Yeah, a boy. Two weeks ago."

A nasty sneer curled Blair's generous lips. "Aren't you the lucky bastard." His glance darted to the door. "Get the hell out of here, Ellison. I don't want my...fiance thinking I'm cheating on him."

In the other room, Simon darted a searching glance over Nick. The other man simply crossed his arms, smirking.

"Is it true?"

Nick nodded, holding up his hand to reveal a heavy ring on his finger. "Ceremony's in two weeks. Romeo belongs to me."

"You're getting married?" Jim asked, the color washing out of his face. "Blair?"

"Romeo," Blair corrected. "Yeah, I am. Seems to be going around." He met Jim's gaze coolly. "Doesn't it?"

"You can't...."

"Can't I? What? You married the bitch that killed me, for the love of god. Am I supposed to wait around for you? Be your bit on the side?"

"She's dead, Blair."

Blair laughed bitterly. "And this is supposed to matter to me because?"

"Blair, I want you to come home. I want it back. I want you back."

"Sorry, no can do. Too little too late. I'm gettng married."

"You love him?"

Blair's generous lips tightened. "Love is highly over rated."

"Blair...?"

"Shut up, Ellison." Blair draped his hand over his eyes. "Go home. I'm tired."

"We need to talk."

"You said everything I want to hear a long time ago. What was it? Oh yeah. Three little words. I'm marrying Alex. That was what you said, right? "She's having my baby." Blair's blue gaze never lost the dead flatness. Never changed with his words. "The woman who killed me." His gaze never wavered as he said, "Get out of here, Ellison. Get out of my life and stay the hell out."

AND SO ENDS THE LOVE OF A GUIDE AND HIS SENTINEL