FALLING OFF THE WAGON

By Karen B

Feedback at KKBELVIS@aol.com

Fandom: Starsky and Hutch

Rated G

Pairing: Starsky and Hutch

Note: Missing scene: Moonshine

Hutch is smart ya know? I swear I was driven there for a minute. "Give me the keys and you can drive." He said. I wanted to drive, I could drive, know how ta drive, I’m gona drive so I handed him the keys so’s I could drive. Next thing I knew I was lain flat across the seat and Hutch was try in ta slide me over hell I thought I was driven. He dangled those damn flashy dance shoes in my face "Maybe if you tried on your little black pumps darlin you’d feel better." Hey those things were expensive don’t toss um in the back seat of my car like their one of your used coffee cups. I wasn’t that far-gone yet.

That gasoline I drank must not have been cut with wood alcohol cause I was feel in no pain. We ended up at some roach motel for the night. Nothing to do except wait for our pick up the next day. I ain’t kid din about the roaches neither. They were the size of my big toe one I think was the size of my.... Ah never mind. Any way I think I saw Hutch pull out his magnum once and go into his freeze police stance as he pointed that cannon of his at one of the big ones. Roach must of assumed the position cause he holstered the cannon and plopped down on the twin bed that was closest to the door.

Earlier I was on my knees next to the Ford throw in up the coffee Hutch told me I had to drink. My head began to feel like a slurp pie. Then there was some guy in there with a chain saw work in away. He must of been using a strobe light to see with to cause my head wanted to fall off with every flash of light. Hutch didn’t come to my side he didn’t want no part of that mess. I couldn’t blame him, but I was start in to feel pretty rotten. Still it was just a real bad hang over. I was not die in from the stuff although now I wish that guy with the buzzing chain saw would just cut off my head.

Starsky slowly stumbled from the motel bathroom being his third trip there in half an hour. The coffee Hutch forced down him doing nothing but coming right back up with vengeance. He toppled onto his small twin bed closest to the bathroom placing one foot to the ground in an attempt to stop the carousel he spun around on.
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Finally he’s going to pass out. Hutch continued to read his newspaper but peered to his partner often checking to see that his eyes were still shut. If he heaves one more time I am gona be sick he thought. Hutch however began to feel guilty remembering Starsky was the one who didn’t want to drink the gasoline placed before him.

What if? His thoughts betrayed him and the guilt hit him full force like a wrecking ball hitting a brick building. What if it was bad liquor what if it was cut with wood alcohol? I sat there and let him drink it right in front of me and did nothing, said nothing. I told him he better drink it if he didn’t want his face bashed in by that good ol boy. Hutch ran his hand down over his face and looked over to his partner again. Damn why the hell does he listen to me? I could have gotten him killed. Killed not because I didn’t see the perp drawing down on him with his gun, not because of some crazed physco path with a vengeance. Because I told him to have a drink. Me his partner who is suppose to back him up to be there to keep watch. I failed this time failed in the worst way any one person could ever fail. I let him do something I knew could be fatal but I just sat there and watched didn’t raise a finger didn’t do a damn thing. Let him down that forbidden drink and didn’t think twice about it.

I was safe sipping on my beer. My beer, legal beer in a clean manufactured government approved glass bottle. Yeah I was safe. Safe as a gun with no bullets. While he had all the danger he took all the risks he played guinea pig putting his life on the line again before mine.

Starsky stirred it hadn’t been even 20 minutes from his last trip to the small sewer they called a bathroom. The red-hot atomic fireball in his stomach awoke again protesting the kool-aid he insisted upon drinking. I’ve had kool-aid stronger then this stuff. Ya what was I think in? About the dumbest thing I have ever done his inner self spoke. Two guys died from drink in the bootleg, and I sit there downing it like a champion. His eyes still closed but fingers gripped the side of the bed trying to hold on trying to beg his stomach for mercy. One drink, two drinks, but I didn’t stop there kept on going I knew it could be deadly but the stuff went down so smooth like ice cream on a hot day. I guess Hutch thought it was safe he didn’t stop me till it was to late. I was out there way out there like in cloud nine out there. Gotta get it together this case isn’t gona wait for me to dry out and get back on the wagon. Damn didn’t even feel myself fall of the damn thing that's how far gone I was. I don’t even remember leave in that bar must of fallen though got a little lump on the back of my head and its throbbing now along with the rest of my head that wants to pop right off my neck. Wish it would pop off maybe roll under the bed so’s I can forget about it for awhile and get some sleep. I am afraid to lift it think it might just roll off and hit the floor. Mouths dry to like someone shoved a handful of dry leaves in there or somethin. Damn it Hutch why didn’t ya stop me before didn’t ya see me on the brink of no return?

The carousel he rode on must of shorted out. It spun out of control the bed that was his horse moving up and down wildly flying around the room in a tailspin. The atomic fireball rose out of his stomach burning all the way up his throat like hot ambers of a camp fire. It lingered for a moment deciding if it wanted to fly back down or blast out.

Hutch watched in dismay as the eyes of his partner flew open. The black dots in the center of the blue ocean looked like snake eyes as the dice rolled around. He was gona be sick again and tried to lift up off the bed and head back toward the sewer. He felt so weak all he could manage to do was swing his other foot to the floor joining the one that was already there. He lifted his body up off the bed, but hung there limply not able to move any further. He looked to Hutch with pleading eyes.

Hutch knew his partner well enough saw the look in his eye‘s, and flew off his bed. He wrenched Starsky up off the bed dragging his partner’s feet on the orange carpeted floor as he pulled him across the small room to the la terrene. Hutch pushed a very weak and sick Starsky down to the floor in front of the ugly green commode just in time. The countdown was over Huston we have a launch. Starsky heaved for what felt like the hundredth time. The nothingness threatened to rip out his entire insides.

The nothing took over his body the ship he was on rocked slowly back and forth keeping him on his knees and hands on the rails for what felt like days. Hutch stood behind him one hand on his shoulder it was the only comfort he could give.

Damn he’s sick. Looks like hell. This is all my fault. Hutch gagged at the sound of his partners retching, but never left his side. He lay a cool towel across the back of Starsky’s neck. Finally the rough sea settled and Starsky pulled away from the ships rail. His face tinted green like the Christmas grinch.

"Partner this is all my fault I am so sorry."

"Hutch what are ya talk in about? You didn’t put a gun to my head and tell me to drink the stuff. Hell I enjoyed it there for awhile. Just got carried away fell off the wagon yeah know."

"Starsk I shouldn’t have let ya drink it. Those two guys died drinking the same stuff. I could have killed ya. I’m suppose to watch your back buddy, and I just sat there instead watching you drink down that poison." Hutch was really shaken and the guilt was all devouring.

"Look Hutch it wasn’t poison I’m still here just sick is all. Just the worst hang over I’ve ever had. My head hurts." He held his head and leaned on the basin in front of him. "I’ll be ok blintz just let me lie here awhile Kay? And stop worrying your worse then my grandmother. Your always there for me partner watching my back like a hawk you didn’t do nothin wrong."

The nothing tried again to come out and Starsky let loose his head and leaned back to the commode. Hutch was there holding Starsky’s weak head for him so it wouldn’t plunge into the sewer. "You done there partner?"

"Done like dinner Hutch. Uh dinner I never am eating again or drinking for that matter." Starsky slumped to the moldy grout tiled floor and lay next to the toilet curled in a ball.

Hutch turned to leave the room. "Hey where ya going?" Starsky lifted a trembling hand toward his partner.

"Getting you a blanket and pillow." The guilt fading some out of his voice.

"Nah just let me lay here please Hutch don’t need nothin just let me lay here." Starsky’s voice was raw from the retching he had just done.

Hutch turned again to leave. "Hey Hutch ." Starsky just looked to his best friend with his swimming tinted green eyes not another word was said Hutch gave a nod the love bond there not needing any more words.

Starsky lay on the cold tile floor no blanket no pillow. The coldness of the tile soothing. The atomic fire ball dwindling inside him. He moaned softly and his arm that he laid his head on twitched once and then was still.

Hutch noticed the movement , and hung a hand over the side of the tub placing it on top of Starsky’s damp curls leaving it rest there. He slid down a little more in the dirty porcelain adjusted his pillow, and pulled the blanket up around his neck with his free hand. He would stay with his inebriated friend that way in his meg shift bath tub bed the rest of the night.

By morning Starsk should be ready to get back on the wagon and get to work and Hutch would be there like the hawk to watch his partners back.

The End