Title: Who I am

Pairing: Spike/Xander

Rating : NC17

Summary: Takes place after Who Am I?

Feedback: If you want to.

Disclaimer: If I were Joss, Spike and Xander would be naked 24/7. They aren't? Guess I'm not Joss then ;-p

A/N: For Lara and Ashley, who both asked for more.

The mansion was deathly quiet as Xander walked through the place. His footsteps were the only sound aside from his laboured breathing. Soon there would be other sounds in the building, sounds of pain, sounds of pleasure, sounds of humiliation. It was something he realized he liked, being dominate over someone else.

See, Xander had never had that before. He was always beta to some else's alpha, except for that time he got possessed. Maybe that was where this feeling came from. It didn't matter. The fact was that something that started out as a way of earning some respect fom Spike turned into a hell of alot more.

After that first time, he went back home to his nice little apartment, his nice comfy job and his beautiful fiance. He thought he could put it all behind him, go back to being the beta, to being the weak one. He couldn't.

The first time he stood up to Anya she was shocked but she let it go. The second time she got angry. By the end of the week she had left him, she needed someone she could control and Xander wasn't it anymore. He had found his teeth, and he used them well.

He couldn't stop thinking about Spike. About how good it felt when he had his cock up his ass, when he made him beg to be fucked. He wanted that feeling again, that power. It was all he could think about, he was obsessed with it. That's what led him to this.

Spike had not been around much after that night. He would come by the shop to get blood or to bum money for smokes but if Xander were there he always left rather quickly. It was almost comical in a way and it gave Xander a rush to know that he had scared the Big Bad away. But soon that wasn't enough. He needed more. He needed to feel that cool skin under his hands, needed to hear that silky voice begging for him.

So just before sunset this evening, Xander went to Spikes crypt and bashed him over the head with a brick. He then rolled the vampire up in a tarp and carried him out to his car and drove to the mansion.

He was currently carrying his burden down to the basement where it had all started. The chains were still hung from the ceiling, the handcuffs in place. Xander dropped his burden to the floor and unwrapped the tarp. He took in the appearance of the passed out vampire. He didn't look so Big Bad when he was out cold. That wouldn't do. Xander wanted to dominate the master vampire, not the soft looking man he was now looking at.

He undressed Spike and hefted him to his feet. He locked the cuffs around the vampires wrists and left him to hang there as he got everything ready.

He went back to the car and pulled a duffle bag out of the trunk before going back inside. Once down stairs he unloaded the contents of the bag onto the floor. He smiled a truely evil smile as he looked at the assortment of 'toys' he had brought with him.

Xander stripped off his shirt and shoes before standing in front of Spike. He struck him across the face, hard. When the vampires eyes fluttered he did it again.

Spike opened his eyes and instantly regretted it. He remembered Xander coming into his crypt and hitting him over the head. And now, he was back here, with a very happy, horny, human who looked like he was justing dying to make him hurt.

It wasn't that he hadn't thought about that night, he had. It had been good, very good but he wasn't sure it was something he wanted to do again. If he gave up control again, he would quickly become addicted to it. It would be like Angelus all over again and what would become of him when Xander tired of it and went back to his nice, safe, boring exsistance?

He was brought out of his thoughts by the first crack of the whip on his back. He cried out as he felt it's sting a second time. By the third lash he was hard and panting. He could smell the arousal pouring off the human behind him. Fuck it, he would enjoy the games as long as they lasted and worry about the future later.

Xander drew blood on the fourth lash and stopped to trail his finger tip through it. He studied the crimson liquid and then sucked the digit into hs mouth. It didn't taste like normal blood, in fact it gave him a tingle when he tasted it. That in mind he stepped closer to the vampire and licked at the mark, collecting the tiny drops of blood.

Spike gasped as he felt the warm tongue lick his back. He knew right then that Xander was going to be more fun than he had thought he would be. He whimpered when the tongue left his back only to howl when the whip made contact again.

Xander was eager to feel the blondes cool flesh around him, to hear him whimper and beg to be fucked so he dropped the whip and grabbed the dagger. He knew the scent of the blood would get to the vampire quickly.

The first cut was shallow and it healed quickly but not before Xander had a chance to taste. The power in Spikes blood thrummed through out his body, making him harder. He wanted more but he knew the dangers. The scond cut was deeper and the blood flowed more freely. Xander used it to preare the vampire roughly, there was no time for gentleness here and he didn't want to be gentle anyway. The only thing keep him from taking Spike dry was the fact that he might hurt himself in the process.

The next cut was just for fun, it was because he could do it and because Spike make pleasant whimpering noises when he did. Xander shucked off his jeans and kicked them away. He walked slowly around the vampire taking in the site of his weeping cock and lust clouded eyes. Oh yeah, this was what he wanted. Now he only needed to make him beg.

Xander coated his hand in Spikes blood and then stood in front of the vampire. He wrapped his bloody hand around his cock and began slowly stroking himself. He made sure that Spike was watching him.

"Hmm, Maybe I won't fuck you after all. Perhaps, I'll just jerk off while you watch. Would you like that? To watch me pleasure myself and deny you release?"

Spike shook his head and whispered 'no'. Xander stepped closer and pulled at one of Spikes nipples as he continued to touch himself.

"What would you like then? Would you like me to touch you?"

"Yes."

It was one word, but it was spoken with such need that Xander smiled. He scraped his nails down the vampires chest and then wrapped his hand around Spikes length. The vampire thrust into his hand involuntarily.

"Uh uh. None of that or I won't touch you again."

Xander stroked Spike a couple of times before withdrawing his hand. He smiled again when Spike sobbed his disapointment.

"I just don't think you want it bad enough yet. Last time you begged for me. I want to hear you beg fo me. Beg for my cock, my fist, my mouth. Doesn't matter, but you will beg before I'm finished."

Xander walked back around Spike and kicked the vampires feet apart. He quickly shoved two fingers into him and roughly carressed his prostate. Spike bucked and whined but he did not beg. Xander grinned. This was going to be fun Breaking him in.

Another finger joined the first two, then a fourth. He knew Spike was getting close, he could feel the tension building in the other mans body. Just before Spike would have cum, Xander withdrew his fingers and stepped away. Spike wailed in frustration, before starting to sob.

"All you have to do is ask nicely, you beg so pretty. Come on lover, you know you want to."

And he did. He really did. But he knew he couldn't give in yet. He couldn't be too easy or Xander would tire of him. He needed to be challenging, to keep the human interested. It had worked on his sire after all. Spike clenched his jaw and lifted his head in determination. He would not beg. Not yet.

Xander decided to play some more, since Spike wasn't begging yet. He picked up the bottle and the dropper and showed them to Spike. He laughed when he saw the look of lust and fear in his eyes. Oh yeah, Spike enjoyed the pain. He began circling Spike again deciding the best place to begin his torture. He decided the tops of his feet would be as good a place as any.

When the first drops hit and his skin began to smoke, Spike shifted to game-face and howled. By the time Xander had burnt his feet, knees, thighs and shoulders he was bucking wildly and screaming. He would have begged if he had been able to form coherent thoughts. He was lost in a sea of pleasure/pain so intense he thought he might drift away for good.

The slap to his face brought him around again. He shook off his demon visage and pleaded with his eyes. He was deserate now. He would do anything if Xander would just fuck him already.

"Ready to beg now?"

"Yes."

"Want me to fuck you?"

"Yes."

"What do you say, Spike?"

"Please."

"Please What?"

"Please fuck me. Please Xander, please. I need it so bad."

"Okay, since you asked so nicely."

Xander spread the vampire's cheeks and pushed inside with one firm stroke. Spike howled and cried as he was torn open. Xander felt the blood lubricate Spikes passage and began to fuck him violently.

"Like this? You want it harder Spike? Faster?"

"Yes. Please!"

"You want my cock so far in you that you can taste it?"

"Please, please, please."

"I'm going to keep you, lock you up down here and fuck you raw. I'm going to make you bleed and scream and beg for more. I'm going to ride you for hours and not let you cum. You will be my dirty little secret, Spike. I'm gonna use you and abuse you and you're going to love me for it."

The words were softly spoken in Spike's ear as Xander continued to pound into him. He reached around and squeezed Spike's cock at the base to prevent him from cumming. Spike began to cry as he was robbed of release once again.

"Say it Spike. Say you're mine, my little fuck toy. Say it and I'll let you cum."

"Yes! Yours! Gods, please just let me cum! Please?"

"Okay."

Xander began to jerk Spike off as he fucked him. They came at almost the same instant, grunting and moaning. When Xander pulled out he stepped away from the vampire and began to dress. He heard Spike ask him one thing.

"Why?"

"Because, Spike. I learned something from our last encounter."

"What?"

"That I like this. The power, the control. It's ....."

"Who you are?"

"Yeah. It's who I am."

THE END