Semi-Precious Stones: Part Seven
Days of Topaz bright
By Zenia
School.
It was different this year. He was different this year. The first day his counselor had pulled him in during History. Mr. Reilly had told him how sorry he was to hear about his mother and that if he ever needed to talk, the door was open.
AJ had smiled, heart pounding, wanting instead to cry. He promised to stop by if he ever needed it.
His mother was dead. He wondered if they would put that on his permanent record.
He had a great view of the track from the window of his geometry class. There he would watch the boys running; legs pumping, arms swinging, bodies sheened with sweat. It gave him a funny feeling in the pit of his stomach.
He was different.
The second week of school Jenny March cornered him in between class periods and kissed him. It had left him dazed and blushing furiously. But no flutter, no desire to become lost in the kiss, not like with Rick.
Queer, fairy, faggot: that’s what they were called. Maybe…
Different.
**********
Rick wasn’t there when he got home from school. He had left a note that he had gone off with a new friend, Carlos Escobar. He’d be back about seven with dinner.
AJ went up to their room, dropping his backpack on the ground. He felt sick and excited and half afraid of being caught. He kicked off his shoes and slipped under the covers of Rick’s bed.
Rick’s pillow smelled like cologne and sweat and…and him. AJ breathed it in, feeling himself get hard. Then he pulled off his t-shirt and stroked his chest, pinching his nipples lightly.
Not enough.
He picked up one of Rick’s shirts off the floor, the one he wore when he mowed the lawn. AJ slipped it on and laid back. The soft cotton teased his nipples, brushed his stomach. He sighed, imagining Rick’s weight above him, hands skimming his thighs, lips teasing at his throat.
AJ’s hand rubbed the front of his jeans.
Rick’s hard-on would be pressing against his belly, insistent. Wanting…wanting, what? AJ’s mouth. Yeah, his mouth.
He undid his jeans, slipped his hand in his pants and started jerking off.
Rick would tell him, no, no, beg him… “Please AJ, please!” his voice strained, needing him, needing what AJ could give him.
And he would, he would. Sucking the tip, licking it. Rick would groan, hands grabbing at AJ’s hair, trying for more. Asking—
AJ gasped, pumping faster.
He’d tease Rick, tease him until he promised—until he said the word. Forever, AJ, forever.
He bit back a scream as he came. When he got his breathing back to normal he licked the stickiness from his hand.
Queer, fairy, faggot; which word would Rick use?
**********
He pushed the noodles into the fried rice and smashed the egg-fu yung with his fork.
“Aren’t you hungry?”
AJ looked up at Rick and blushed. “Not—not really.”
Rick nodded and stared down at his plate.
So quiet.
“Have you ever slept with a man?” He tried to keep his breathing even, despite the fact that his heart was ready to come up through his throat.
Rick paused at the question. “That’s none of your business.” Then he started eating again.
AJ swallowed. “I think there’s something wrong with me.”
“What?” Rick put the fork down and stared at him.
“Jenny March kissed me. She—I didn’t like it.”
His brother shrugged. “Maybe you don’t like Jenny March.”
“She’s pretty and popular and smart. She kissed me and she was soft and…and she smelled sweet. And I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”
“AJ—”
“In gym sometimes I have to stop myself from staring at the other guys.” His voice was shaking. He was going to puke.
“AJ—”
“I don’t think I like girls. I think I like boys. I think—”
“AJ!” Rick got up and grabbed him. He pulled AJ to his feet.
“Are you going to hit me?”
Rick blinked. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“There’s a boy at school, Tommy. They say he likes boys. All the guys, they beat him up. They say even his brother hits him. Are you gonna hit me ‘cause—‘cause I’m a faggot?”
“Don’t use that word. Have I ever hit you because of who you are? Have I?”
He shook his head.
“Why would I start now?” Rick sighed and squeezed his shoulder gently.
“I don’t know.”
“Dammit AJ, why can’t you make things easy.” He laughed. “Geez, look who’s talkin’. I don’t know how many times Mom told me that.”
“You don’t care?” He knew he sounded scared, but he couldn’t help it.
“Of course I care. It’ll be hard for you, especially if you don’t like girls too. You’ll have to be careful.” Rick looked into his eyes. “I love you. You’re my brother.”
Relief brought tears to his eyes and so he closed them. Then he felt Rick’s mouth brush against his gently.
“Rick,” he whispered. His brother hadn’t used any of the words that might hurt him. Instead there was love and laughter and kisses.
He was different and Rick didn’t care.
