Title: House Rules

# 7 in the Father Figure Series

Author: Amethyst

Pairing: none

Warning: DD/CP

Summary: Together Jim and Blair comprise a list of expected behaviors for our young, insecure anthropologist.

This is the standard disclaimer. They don't belong to me. This story is not intended to violate any copyrights held by Paramount, UPN, or Pet Fly Productions.

This story contains DD/CP. Be warned.

Blair gradually woke to soft sounds of quiet voices coming from the living room. His room was dark and the subdued sounds of nightfall registered on the edges of his consciousness.

Opening his eyes to bare slits, he glanced at the alarm clock to the left of his head. 10:08 PM. His face dropped heavily back into his pillow. He must have fallen asleep after dinner. He didn't even remember lying down. He groaned softly and turned over to his back, rubbing gritty and swollen eyelids.

"SHIT! JESUS!" Blair rapidly reversed his position, flopping belly down hard enough to knock the air from his lungs. He screwed his eyes shut tight enough to hurt and grabbed fists full of pillow case on either side of his head. Then his hands immediately flew to his burning flesh as his memory flooded back.

The unfortunate incident with the redhead. The pretty, seductive redhead. The pretty, seductive, undercover vice-cop, friend to "Ironman" Ellison, let me help you teach your gullible little partner a lesson redhead. Now he remembered.

The argument with his overbearing, dominating, overprotective and inflexible Blessed Protector.

Their discussion and both of their eventual agreement on and acceptance of their roles in this unique sentinel/guide, father-type/son-like, best friends and partners relationship.

The reason his butt felt like his boxers were on fire all the way to the bone.

Jim had spanked him.

Jim had told him what to expect for breaking his promises and needlessly endangering his life and he had agreed to accept his punishment. A good old-fashioned bare butt over the knee spanking. The bare butt part had been an unpleasant surprise. That had been just three hours ago.

<What the HELL was I thinking? God this hurts SO much! I'll never make it out of this bed. Jim wasn't kidding when he said this was going to be a big one.

The pain from previous spankings had not even come close to this one. Blair tentatively touched his burning backside and quickly removed his hands. A strangled sob escaped his throat as he turned to his right side and propped himself up on his elbow. Forgetting the voices in the living room, a soft round of "Shit, shit ,shit !" fell in a rapid chant from his lips.

His bedroom door opened and in two giant strides, his roommate was by his side in full overprotective mode. Large warm hands gently touched his upper arms, lending support and steadying the quivering young man. Jim turned on the bedside lamp and crouched down in front of the sleep-tousled form before him.

"Hey, Chief. I was beginning to think you were going to sleep straight through to morning." One massive hand soothed brown curls off Blair's face and gently cupped his chin, tilting his face into the light. "How are you feeling, Junior?" The questioning voice was soft and tender, the light blue eyes clear and penetrating.

A rush of anger and defiance at his partner's earlier actions erupted in Blair. Embarrassment and shame immediately replaced both emotions when he looked up into the concerned and devoted face of the man who made his world into everything Blair had ever wanted. Even in the dim light of the bedroom lamp, the love and caring in Jim's face shone though.

"All r-right, I guess. I-I can't sit up. It really hurts, Jim. " A small sniffle sounded and small hands reached out to grasp Jim's muscled forearms. "I need to go to the bathroom but I don't think I can get up." Blair's tear stained cheeks blushed pink with embarrassment, his voice a mere whisper.

Jim's face softened and his voice was low and comforting. "Come on, Chief. I'll help you up. You'll feel better once you're upright and moving. I know it hurts. It's going to hurt for a couple of days, Darwin. That's part of what makes you remember our discussion earlier. Remember your promises from earlier. No pain, no gain, Junior."

Strong arms literally lifted him from his bed as he swung his legs to the floor, leaving him in an upright position and steadying him as he gained his balance.
A surprised gasp of pain escaped involuntarily from Blair as the fire re-ignited in his backside. Blair rubbed roughly at his sleep gummed and swollen eyes, attempting to brush away fresh tears. He didn't want Jim thinking he couldn't handle whenever his blessed protector handed out.

He had accepted Jim's decision to spank him and he would accept the consequences of his thoughtless behavior. <But, MAN, does this HURT! I will never, ever do something so stupid that Jim feels the need to get my attention this way again! NEVER!

Jim's left arm slid across Blair's shoulders while his right hand adjust his rumpled T-shirt into place as he guided the small body slowly to the hallway.

Jim whispered into the disheveled hair by his left shoulder. "Simon's here. He's in the living room. He stopped by to pick up the tent he and Daryl are borrowing for their camping trip this weekend. The father/son thing from Daryl's school. He just got here a few minutes before you woke up, Chief. Are you OK enough to go out there?"

"God, no Jim! I don't want Simon to see me like this! I look like I've been crying!"

"That because you have been, Darwin." A large hand gently tousled his already disheveled hair, adding a light thump to the top of his head. " Why don't you just head on down to the bathroom as quick as you can and I'll try and get him out the door before you come back. I have to run down to the basement to get the tent. I'll get him to go with me. OK? The lights are off on this side of the room. There's only one sentinel here. Simon can't see you clearly."

Even at arms length, Jim could feel the heat pouring off his remiss young charge's backside and cataloged his increased heart and respiratory rates, the dried tracks of tears on his face and the fresh ones brimming in his anxious blue eyes.

"Go on. It'll be all right. Wash your face." Jim gently prodded the shuffling young man out the bedroom door and down the hall. Blair's gait was stiff and small grunts of discomfort softly escaped with each shallow breath. Face averted and hair hanging forward, he arrived at the bathroom without even seeing Simon. Blair let out a long sigh of relief and closed the door.

Even the cautious and abbreviated movements necessary to relieve himself and wash up caused the fire in his bottom to burst into even greater flames. Blair wanted desperately to return to his bed, but dreaded the return walk down the hall. His boxers felt like they were made of sandpaper.

Blair splashed his face with cold water with the help of a washcloth and stared at himself in the mirror. His eyes were red, swollen and gritty with sleep. His hair was wild and his complexion blotchy. Lines criss-crossed his right cheek from the wrinkled sheets of his bed. He looked like a small child. He began to berate himself out loud.

"I not only feel like a little kid, I look like one too. At least with Jim and Simon down in the basement, I can whimper all I want on the way back. Bad decisions, breaking my promises, scaring Jim, a bare butt spanking, and now I can't even handle my punishment without whining and crying. What a baby! Just like a five year-old." Blair took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "Come on Sandburg! Don't let Jim see you like this. Be a man."

He mentally prepared himself for the return journey to the far away land known as his bedroom. Three steps to the door and out into the hall, Blair was softly sobbing, once again admonishing himself out loud. Small shivers shook his slight frame causing his boxers to rub repeatedly against his hurting bum.

"Fuck it! I'll be man tomorrow. Or the next day. GOD, my butt hurts! I want to lie down. I want to go to bed and be warm. I want Jim to rub my back again until I go back to sleep. I can be a five-year-old for a couple more hours, no problem." His voiced sounded small and whining in the empty loft.

The sound of a deep male voice loudly clearing its throat startled him just outside his room. Blair unsuccessfully tried to muffle the whimper emitting from his own throat and stood perfectly still. <OK, a not so empty loft.

Simon. He'd know that deep bass voice anywhere, even just a grunt. Shit! Had he just been talking out loud? Oh, God, he had! Maybe Simon hadn't heard him! . Maybe he could run into his room. Maybe he could pretend he hadn't heard Simon. Maybe the sun wouldn't come up tomorrow either. Maybe he should just turn around.

Slowly Blair turned to face the tall, imposing man standing in the kitchen. Nervously tucking strands of hair behind his right ear, he gave Simon a small wave of his right hand using his left to keep his balance on the wall outside his room.

"Hi Simon. I-I thought you were going to the basement with Jim. To get the tent.
I-I didn't realize you were still here. Ah, Hi!" Restless hands plucked at the hem of his shirt.

"I was on my way down with Jim when I got a call. The battery on my cell phone is almost dead. I kept losing the signal. It was Daryl, so I called him back from here. Jim went down to the basement by himself. He said he'd be back up in just a minute." Noticing the way the young man held himself and the condition of his eyes and general appearance, a look of concern fell over the older man's face. "Are you all right, Sandburg?"

"All right? Yeah, I'm fine Simon. Everything OK with Daryl? No problems about tomorrow I hope. He's been really looking forward to this weekend with you. You two don't get enough time together, no matter how hard you try to find it. He's talked about it every time I've seen him since you said you'd go."

Blair slowly edged his way closer to his room, as he continued talking up a blue streak. He finally made it to his doorway only to brush his tortured backside against the doorknob. With a muffle yelp of distress, his hands involuntarily flew to his aching butt. Suddenly remembering he had an audience, Blair pulled his hands away from his hindquarters and ran them though his hair.

Simon took a step closer to him, confusion and concern clearly written in his expression.

"Blair? What's wrong? Are you in pain? Have you been crying?" Simon quickly ran over the conversation he had overheard coming from the young observer as he came out of the bathroom. His butt hurt? He was a five-year-old? He wanted Jim to rub his back again? Sudden understanding dawned on the big man. Recognizing the signs and symptoms of a recently spanked wayward youngster, Simon hid the knowing smile trying to force it's way to the surface. He was aware Jim had discipline the young man before him on at least one other occasion, and suspected more occasions he wasn't aware of.

"Nothing's wrong, Simon. I-I stubbed my toe coming out of the bathroom. T-that really hurts, you know? It just made my eyes water, that's all. And made me walk a little stiff, you know. I'll be fine once I get off it. I'd better go lie down and put my foot up. I hope you and Daryl have a great time. Jim and I always do. Daryl is all right, isn't he? I mean the phone call and everything?"

Blair was halfway through his bedroom door, but held back, concern for the young man in question clear. Despite his obvious attempt to leave Simon's company as soon as politely possible, his need to know his friend was all right took precedence.

"Daryl's just fine. Just his tenth reminder of the day to pick him up on time in the morning. He IS very excited." Simon struggled to keep his expression gruff and irritated. "Your toe, huh? Well, I guess you had better get to bed then. We wouldn't want any permanent damage, now would we?"

Blair blushed, realizing Simon wasn't falling for his obfuscation, but unwilling to clarify the story further.

"Ah, no. Good night, Simon."

"Sandburg? Maybe you should bring a cushion to the station with you on Monday. Just in care your INJURY is still giving you trouble." The big man allowed a small understanding smile to come to his lips.

Blair blushed a deep shade of red, realizing the captain had guessed the true nature of his injury. He dipped his head down and stammered out a mortified "Ah, umm, I-I..."

"For your foot. You might want to prop up your foot on a cushion." Simon caught Blair's anxious gaze and pinned him in place with a knowing look. "Just in case you need to. After all, if you don't, you could always sit on it. God knows the desk chairs aren't very comfortable. Maybe Jim would like one too. You just might start a trend in the bullpen."

Blair relaxed his shoulders slightly and took a shaky breath. A small smile turned up the corners of his lips as he realized the small save to his tattered dignity Simon was offering.

"Uh, thanks, Simon. Maybe I will. Just in case. 'Night, Simon. Say hi to Daryl for me, please."

Blair slipped through his bedroom door and softly closed it. A grin burst across Simon's face as he silenced the chuckle that threatened to escape. The last thing he wanted was to have Blair think he though Jim punishing him was amusing. It wasn't and he didn't, but the chastised young man's attempts to cover up his 'injury' WERE amusing. Simon couldn't help but wonder what new and outlandish action by his favorite little obfuscator had ended with his best detective dishing out a spanking. A pretty sound spanking, if the boy's appearance was anything to go by.

Caught in mid-speculation, Simon started as Jim came through the door. Jim placed the tent on the floor by the door and calmly looked Simon in the eye expectantly. Simon returned his gazed.

"You heard everything?"

"Just the last of it. I didn't think it would take me so long to find the tent. Blair put it away last time we camped. I really wanted to be back before he came out of the bathroom. I promised him I'd take you with me to the basement. I didn't want him surprised to see you when he came out. "

"Well, he certainly was surprised. And embarrassed. You must have tanned his butt good. He was whimpering the whole way up the hall. When he wasn't talking to himself. Care to share this one?" Simon lay an understanding hand on Jim's shoulder. " I know how hard it must have been for you to do that to him. I know how hard it is for me with Daryl. But if you love them, you've got to rein them in once in a while. From the looks of him, it must have been serious. "

Jim ran a hand over his face and exhaled slowly. Simon was right, it HAD been hard on him. Almost as hard as it had been on Blair. It was very difficult for him to inflict pain on his young guide, even when it was to find a way to manage his young charge's more unacceptable and dangerous behavior.

Jim realized that punishment fell into the category of caring for and protecting the guide. He doubted his guide felt that way. Especially right now.

"Yeah, Simon it was. But I think I'll save it for another time, thanks. Blair and I still have somethings to work out over this one. Maybe we can talk next week over a beer when we both have more time. I need to go check on him. He's having a little trouble maneuvering just yet." Jim moved expectantly to the door.

"I understand. Just say the word and I'll be there. I'll even buy." Simon walked to the door and opened it. He dropped his voice to a low whisper. "Oh, by the way, he wants you to rub his back again. Heard him talking to himself when he came out of the bathroom." A quick pat on the shoulder and Simon was out the door, tent in one hand. "Good night, Jim. See you both Monday morning. Don't forget the cushions."

A bemused look settled over Jim's face with a slight disbelieving grin. "Thanks, Simon. Have fun. Say hi to Daryl for us." He closed the loft door with a firm push of his hand and set the locks in place.

Jim knocked softly on Blair's bedroom door as he quietly entered the room. "You OK there, Chief?" Blair lay on his bed, belly down, and face pressed into the pillow.

He turned his head to look at Jim, tears brimming and eyes dark with embarrassment. "Simon knows. All he had to do was take one good look at me and he knew. How can I face him at the station Monday? He even suggested bringing a cushion to work! God, I feel so embarrassed!" He quickly turned his face back into the sheets.

Jim sat down on the bed beside the chastised young man and gently pulled the covers up and around the shivering body. He placed his right hand on the middle of Blair's back and began rubbing soothing patterns across the small form.

"You'll be just fine Monday. There's nothing to be embarrassed about, Chief. Don't you think Simon's handed out a spanking or two to Daryl over the years? Of course he recognized that you'd been spanked. Don't you think he understands? Its comes with the territory of fatherhood, or so I've been told. You've got nothing to worry about with Simon. He knows to keep this at home were it belongs, between us. Simon wouldn't betray your trust, you know that."

Blair turned the upper half of his body slightly onto his right side, taking care not to dislodge the warm hand on his back, and gazed up at his blessed protector. His eyes glistened with unshed tears and his lower lip quivered slightly.

"I feel so stupid. I'm so sorry about everything. I didn't mean to worry you and to break my promises. I just didn't think it through. Now I messed up and Simon knows and I'm cold and I'm tired and I can't turnover and my butt REALLY hurts!"
Tears spilled down his cheeks as he sobbed brokenly, gasping for needed air.

Jim's right hand continued rubbing soothing patterns as his left hand gently brushed silky curls off Blair's cheek and forehead. One large thumb carefully wiped at the pale cheek tinged with the pink of shame.

"Sssh, Chief. It's going to be OK. I know you're sorry. I know you're cold and tired. Don't worry about anything more tonight, Junior. Just rest. I'm right here. Right beside you. I'm not going anywhere, Blair. Just close your eyes and go to sleep, Chief. You're safe. Sssh."

The feeling of warmth and security gradually lulled the exhausted young guide to the edge of sleep. His last conscious thought was of warm caring hands gently soothing his distressed heart. Reaching up with his left hand, Blair latched onto the hand caressing his tear-soaked cheek.

"Love you." He whispered sentinel soft. A small smile touched his lips as a tender kiss was placed upon his head. Sleep claimed the guide as an echoed "love you" was whispered in his ear.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Rules? MORE house rules? You have to be kidding me, Jim! There are all ready four billion house rules. I can't even remember them all, there are so many. WE don't need any more. Trust me on this one, man. We do not need anymore rules!"

Blair placed his fork on to his plate and gingerly shifted his position against the kitchen counter. Breakfast was a standing room only affair this morning, at least for Blair. After last night's punishment, sitting was out of the question for the young guide, and probably would be for next the day or so. He awoke with a pounding headache and an aching butt. The headache improved slightly with aspirin and the ache in his butt increased with each movement he made. His attitude deteriorated with each increase in his physical discomfort.

As his body stiffened in response to the undertone of defiance in his young roommate's voice, Jim's facial expression remained pleasant and calm. He was acutely aware of the boy's fragile physical state. He had let the young man sleep late in consideration of his exhaustion from last night, hoping for an improved mood this morning. Apparently, this was not to be the case. A small sigh escaped as he drew in a calming breath and counted to five.

"Blair, after your behavior yesterday, I think some new house rules are exactly what's needed here. They are just common sense, but you seem to be running short in that department lately, Chief. I think we need to go over what's expected of you. What I expect from you. What you can expect from me when you break these rules. This is some serious stuff we're talking about, Junior, and I want your full attention here."

Blair jumped indignantly away from the counter, placing his plate down with more enthusiasm that necessary.

"Why? You punished me for yesterday already! I said I wouldn't do it again. I promised to be more careful! I'll keep my promise, man."

"That's what you said last time, Junior. It didn't last a week. No, I think we need to sit down and work this out so there is no question about what is expected here. From both of us." Jim carried his breakfast dishes to the sink and began to usher his young roommate toward his room.

"Go find a tablet and something to write with, Chief. We're going to make a little list here, so there's no confusion about what's been decided. Then we can post it on the refrigerator for easy reference when things start to slip your mind. Go on. Then come right back here to the kitchen. You can prop yourself up here at the island and write while we discuss things."

Disbelief and outrage were clearly written on Blair's face. His cheeks flushed red with emotion and he pulled away from his mentor's light touch. Turning to face his companion, he stopped dead in his tracks. As he opened his mouth to object, Jim raised an eyebrow and put his hands on his hips.

"I don't think that backside of yours is up to anymore in-depth discussions right now, Junior. I'd watch what comes out of your mouth if I were you. Don't think I didn't notice your belligerent attitude with the plate, Einstein. I wouldn't push it. Unless you really want to have to take a cushion to the station on Monday?" His voice was firm and left no question as to the seriousness of his intent to follow though if need be.

Blair immediately closed his mouth, whatever blistering comment he had ready dying on his lips. < OK, a list. I can write a list. It doesn't mean there will be anything we agree upon to write down. This will be a really short list, big guy.
He turned and huffed into his room, retrieving a notepad and pen from his desk.

Returning to the hallway he found Jim casually leaning against the center island in the kitchen, a thoughtful and determined look on his face. He tossed the notebook on the counter, body language screaming defiance and determination.

Jim gave his wayward young charge a hard stare. Blair returned the stare, tossing the pen on top of the notebook with enough force to cause it to slide off the counter to the floor. Jim's expression hardened into granite and his jaw clenched tightly. Blair shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other, but he made no move to retrieve the fallen pen. Suddenly Blair found himself tucked under a massive arm, backside presented and toes off the ground. Six stinging swats landed on his already tortured bottom.

"Ouch! Ouch! Owww! Stop! Please, Jim stop! Uhhhhhn! Pleeease!"

Four more swats landed before he was flipped in the air and settled on his feet. "What did I just say? I'm not going to tolerate this kind of childish behavior from you, Junior. We have a lot to work out here and I am NOT playing games, young man. You had better start taking this seriously or we going to have a long and painful afternoon. My afternoon will be long. Yours will be long and painful. Your choice, kiddo."

Blair gasped and swallowed a startled yelp of pain and surprise. Tears streamed down his cheeks and hands gingerly rubbed his flaming backside. The additional smacks have been more than enough to reawaken the fierce ache in his bottom. Suddenly, defying the older man seemed like a very foolish idea. Blair quickly but cautiously retrieved the pen from the floor and picked up his notebook.

Glancing up at the silent and reproachful older man, shame and remorse bubbled up from the depth of his heart. He knew Jim's only concern was to protect and care for him, to keep him safe. Jim's only motivation was love. He was his best friend, his protector, comforter, companion and partner. Jim provided many things in Blair's free-spirited young life--stability, security, discipline, a male role model, comfort and love. Jim's dedication to him was steadfast and uncompromising, and Blair loved him for it. Even the overbearing, over- authoritarian parts of it. Sometimes it was just hard to accept.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to act like a brat. Really, man, I'm just a little thrown by all of this. Rules and things. I never had to deal with a lot of them until I lived here and worked down at the PD. I mean, academia has its deadlines and schedules, but they're pretty flexible if you know how to work with them. I'm used to having a fairly free rein with what I do, you know? I understand what you're saying but it's a little hard to adapt after all this time on my own. Naomi's rule was to enjoy life. Get the most and the best experiences out of it. Explore. Experience. It's kind of hard to do that sitting on the sidelines being careful. It's hard to adjust. I know you want what's best for me. And I'll try and be more cooperative. I will. I just don't know what you want."

Blair looked lost and forlorn. His hands griped the pen and notebook tightly. Standing there, shifting his weight from foot to foot, rubbing tearstains from his face, Jim was amazed once again how terribly young and innocence his charge appeared.

He understood how very different and difficult this was on the young man. Naomi had been a loving but infrequent presence in Blair life, especially the last decade, and had provided very little, if any stability or consistency in Blair's childhood or adult life time. She had even taught him to "detach with love," never staying with someone or somewhere if it meant commitment. Commitment to a temporary cause or an idealistic belief, yes, but never to real life and real people.

It always amazed him that Blair had coped as well as he had growing up. Blair was a unique and wonderful young man, brilliant and gifted. Unfortunately, part of the problem was that in his mid- twenties, Blair was still growing up. The part that needed to pay attention to rules, common sense and judgement was still in its infancy. Jim recognized the cause and had a solution. A solution that had stood the test of time and would hopefully produce an improvement in the judgement skills of the young man before him.

"That's exactly what we're going to set straight here, Chief. I know this is new and different for you. Believe me, a lot of this may seem harsh or unfair, but over the years, my experiences have taught me that a little discipline goes a long way toward changing reckless behavior. I think that's what I'm seeing here. We need to set up some guidelines, rules, to make you think twice about things. If beating your butt until you can't sit for a month is the answer then that's what I'm prepared to do. You're a brilliant kid, Einstein, but part of the learning center of your brain seems only to be connected to the pain receptors in you butt."

Jim tapped the notebook with his fingertips and then moved them to tip Blair's chin up to meet his eyes. "Let's get this over with, Chief. We've spent enough time on explanations. This IS going to happen."

Blair stared long moments into the stern but caring eyes. Finally, he gave a slight nod of his head and let out a resigned sigh. This day was NOT going his way.

"OK, what do I write?"

"New house rules, Chief. Let's start with rule number one. Your class and teaching schedule, including office appointments, will be up to date and written down at all times. I expect a copy of it and to be updated if there are any changes. If I need to find you I don't want to have to waste time tracking you down. Understood?"

Blair nodded and wrote on the paper. He already did this, more or less, so this was of little concern. He would just have to remember to give Jim an update when things changed. No problem.

"Number two: Unless you've make previous arrangements with me, you'll be home by 1 am or have called to let me know where you are and with whom."

"Hey, man, give a guy a little privacy here." Blair blushed and ducked his head.

"I don't want the details of your love life, Romeo. Just the location of the body."
Blair heaved a sigh but wrote down number two.

"Number three. While we're on the subject of locating you, let's add the cell phone. You WILL carry a charged and functional cell phone on you at all times. It had better be turned on, too. This is a safety thing, Chief, no arguments." When it came to his personal safety there was no budging his sentinel. Blair wrote number three down.

"Number four. At no time will you needlessly or knowingly endanger your health or your physical or emotional well being. You will tell me when you're not feeling well or if you've been injured, no matter how minor, and if you have been placed in a dangerous or potentially dangerous situation, either by yourself or by someone else. No matter who that someone else is. Are we clear on this one?"

"Jeez, Jim. That covers a lot of territory. How do I know what you consider needless? Do you really want to know when I stub my toe or bump my head? How do I know if a situation is dangerous unless I'm already in it? I can't figure out what you'll expect from me all the time. Be reasonable." Blair set the notebook down on the island with a decided slap, frustration and self-pity playing across his expressive young face.

"You mean to tell me you don't know the difference between right and wrong? Between a bump on the head and blow to the head? You don't think that if you had taken the time to access the situation yesterday, you wouldn't have made some different decisions? I don't believe that for one minute, Darwin. You have a finely tuned sense of right and wrong, more than most. You know when your health is a problem, but you hide it until you're falling down and practically need a hospital. That type of behavior is over as of now. You WILL follow these rules. I AM being reasonable. You've put yourself at risk too many times, Junior. You obviously can't control your own behavior, so I'm going to help you. And you are going to help me help you. This isn't up for debate or discussion. I suggest you get writing." A hard unyielding gaze accompanied the command.

With a decidedly belligerent snort, Blair grabbed the notebook and began writing, mumbling to himself. "This is SO not fair, man. I can't read your mind. It's not fair to expect me to. Some DISCUSSION this turned out to be."

Jim straightened up from his position against the island and hardened his voice to steel. "Do you have something constructive you'd like to add to this discussion, Chief?"

Blair glanced up and caught sight of his sentinel's body language and registered to steely tone of his voice. Deciding his butt had seen all the action it could tolerate for the day, he quickly retreated.

"No. It's just not much of a discussion. Everything is about what I have to do. What new rules apply to you?"

"We'll deal with that in a minute. I have two more rules to add. After that, we can add more rules if the need arises. We'll just have to see how you do. Rule number five. This goes back to the trust problem, Chief. You will stop blindly putting your trust in people that you don't know. And I mean, know well. You have a close circle of friends you know you can rely on, Simon, Daryl, Joel, H, Rafe, Megan, your mom and me. Dr. Stoddard, Stephen and my dad, too. You have to keep in mind that you are at greater risk since working with me and being part of Major Crimes. Some people see you as an in to the department. Not because you are weak or gullible, but because you are the only one there who isn't trained to suspect and examine every stranger that approaches you. I don't want you to become paranoid and defensive with people. I just want you to think a little more about what COULD happen sometimes. Think through the possibilities. Protect yourself."

Remembering the events that lead to forcing this conversation to occur, Blair blushed deep pink with embarrassment. Ducking his head lower, he wrote rule number five on the list. THE LIST. This was rapidly becoming the first piece of paper Blair had truly ever hated. He had hated assignments and tests before, but never a piece of paper. Until now. He just couldn't wait to see it hanging on the refrigerator, mocking him everyday.

"Rule number six. No obfuscation, no lying, no half-truths and no modified version of the truth. This is completely non-negotiable. If I find out that you have handed me even the tiniest obfuscation, you will be one sorry little boy."

Color drained from the younger man's face, leaving his complexion pale and eyes wide with apprehension. < Shit! Half my life is obfuscation. It's my best conversational tool! It's saved my butt a thousand times. I'll never be able to pull this off. I should just make appointments with Jim for a daily spanking now. Maybe two. Save him the trouble of hunting me down. Man, I'll never survive this. Correction, I'll survive, I'll just never sit down again.

While Blair contemplated a future spent lying on his stomach, Jim worked to bring the tense conversation to and end.

"Last on the list is what you can expect from me if you break these rules. I don't really think I need to spell it out Chief, but I want to be clear on this. You break the rules, you butt pays the price. Simple as that. There are only six little rules and each one is clear and we just agreed we both understand them. There should be no question when you've violated one and no question as to the penalty for doing it. But keep in mind, if you break one and I don't find out and you don't tell me, you can add two weeks of grounding to the punishment right off the bat. Depending on the circumstances, there might be more, but never less."

"God, Jim! Don't I get any say in this."

"No."

"Just like that. No?" Disbelief rang heavily in Blair's voice.

"Just like that, Junior. No. All the talking in the world isn't going to change my mind or you attitude. It's a done deal, adjust."

Jim removed the notebook from the shocked young man's grip and tore out the page Blair had been writing on. "Post this on the refrigerator and let's see if there is a game on tonight worth watching. You can lie on the couch. I get the remote." He tousled the dark curls on Blair's head as he passed into the living room and turned on the television.

Blair was left standing in the kitchen, paper in one hand and a lost expression on his face. He blinked hard two or three times and tried to remember when he lost track of the conversation. How had he ended up committed to THE LIST and all it implied? Why was he standing here alone in the kitchen with a stupid look on his face and the hated paper in his hand? Jim had uttered the dreaded NO word, that's how. Like a command from God, NO. There was no arguing with the No word, NO how, NO way. God, sometimes his blessed protector was completely unreachable, inflexible, intolerant and down right immovable.

Blair sighed the deep sigh of a condemned man, and slowly turned to post THE LIST. He grabbed two beers from the fridge and handed one to Jim as he gingerly lowered himself to the couch belly down. Pulling a throw pillow under his head, he squirmed to find a comfortable spot.

Jim dropped onto the other couch and tapped the top of Blair's head. "So, Chief, when do you want to go shopping. The ride might be a little rough on you, but I figure you'll want to pick out you own. I don't have much of an eye for color. I was thinking something bright and cheery. Maybe some stripes or one of those Indian prints you like so much."

Blair jerked his head around to stare at the older man, confusion clear on his face. "What are you talking about? What do we need to go shopping for? Bright colors for what?"

Jim struggled to keep the smile from his face and his voice. "You know, Junior. For the cushion. The one for your foot Simon suggested. I really think the bullpen needs a little color and brightening up. We could get coordinated........" SMACK!

The couch throw pillow from under Blair's head landed square in Jim's face quickly followed by another. SMACK! Jim pounced across the armrest to pin Blair's shoulders to the cushions, fingers tickling defenseless ribs. The sounds of hysterical laughter laced with gasps for breath rang thought the loft.

"No, Jim! Stop! Stop! HAAAHHAAHHA! Don't make me laugh! It makes my butt hurt! No, stop!! AAAAAAH! Jiiiiiimmmm."